Learning how to practice emotional intelligence is learning how to wield the power of choice in your favor.
But what about when you're triggered as f*!k? Not to fear babe, we are going to break down emotional intelligence, so you can stop taking offense, boost your feelings of self-worth and evolve into the highest version of you.
1. Recognize that everything is a mirror.
One thing I know to be true is, everyone is a mirror. When someone says something that triggers you, it is simply a reflection of the shadow that is already inside you.
Here's an example — when someone in your family verbalizes their doubts about your ability to make your business work… this would trigger you, right? Well, babe, the only reason it would trigger you is, if you hold fear around your ability to be successful in the first place. If you faced that fear with courage and healed the trauma that caused that self-sabotaging thought, those comments would never trigger you. You would own your worth and believe in your success, without a doubt!
Take a moment to become highly aware of your emotional state. Observe the emotion, without judgment. Feeling emotions is a vital part of the human experience — feeling emotions is safe. However, choosing to stay in that negative emotional state is self-sabotaging. Here's a fantastic method I use to shift out of negativity fast and practice emotional intelligence.
Action Step: Journal it out. Think about a comment that has been said to you recently that triggered you. How is it a reflection of your shadow? What thought within you believes that this comment has relevance? How are they verbalizing your internal fears?
2. Apply big-picture thinking to manage emotions.
Every relationship that comes into our lives has a purpose. Take a step back and ask yourself, “How can I grow from this?”, that is where the answers lie. We are here to evolve and grow ourselves, our businesses, but most importantly, our souls.
Remember how everyone was freaking out over Shakira and JLo's halftime performance? When you take a step back and inquire as to why so many people (especially women) were triggered by the performance, it boils down to one thing — they deep down want the fierce, feminine freedom those two embodied up there on stage. When you start viewing triggers in this light, your perspective of the world changes!
Ask yourself, “If my soul were speaking to me, what would it say? What insight would it have for me?” That is where the magic is! When you get to the bottom of the issue and gain clarity on what is to be gained from the situation, the situation no longer has power over you! It dissolves into nothing and you are left with a grand chance to become a higher version of yourself. This is one of the beautiful things that happen when you practice emotional intelligence, on the daily.
3. Embrace humility + compassion.
We are always growing and learning — every one of us. There is always a lesson to be learned or a new perspective to take on a situation. Every trigger you come across is a grand opportunity to go within and heal yourself — but sometimes we choose to stay triggered. When this happens, have compassion with yourself. Do not stay in the triggered funk for too long, get back up and move on. Do not beat yourself up if you fail to practice emotional intelligence once or twice. Have compassion for your beautiful self. After all, this is a life's work! You've got this babe.
One of the most humbling things to do is the work of self-development. When you truly surrender to learning the lessons that life throws at you on a soul level, there is no room for pride. Humility and embodiment of the lessons learned to become the highest version of you is a choice we all have available to us. The question is, will you choose to practice emotional intelligence?
Be sure to comment and tell us about a recent time you've chosen to grow when you were trigger as f*!k.
Enjoyed the post? You will love the advice and training I give in my Facebook group the Whole Soul Collective. It is a group that supports you in creating an authentic business so you can profit from your biz, as you do all the inner work!